My first drive

Do you remember what it was like driving for the first time? In case you’ve forgotten and you want to relive it…come to Bangkok and get in a rental car and take a drive to Khao Yai National park. It’s like driving in a car that you are unfamiliar with times ten. Everything is backward, everything! A guy showed up with the rental van at 6:45 am, showed me where to fill with gas, handed me the key and said “I come back at 7 on Monday, you pay me then.”, then walked away. No paper work, no money up front.

As we where about to drive away that morning, I looked up and adjusted the rear view mirror; it just didn’t feel right; all the angles were confusing. We met some friends in our little community Nichada, then started off with a drive through some local streets first. Not so bad, the speeds are slow and I had been on these streets many times in taxis and on my bike. It was also 7:30 am on a Sunday morning so the traffic was light but would grow quickly on this three-day weekend of the Kings birthday.

As we entered the freeway things started getting crazy. Keep in mind this was an 11 person passenger van with curtains covering half of each window behind the driver so the visibility was poor. As I checked my (right) side mirror to merge on this elevated two-lane freeway, a car was passing another on the left at a very high rate of speed. I let him go whizzing by then pulled into the lane. As I brought my attention forward I realized that I hadn’t noticed the onramp was coming to an end. Now my heart was pumping, my hands where clinched and beginning to sweat. I was using every bit of my starbucks double mocha to keep from crashing into someone or something while at the same time trying to keep up with my friend that drives like the Thais. OK, it should be noted that he was from California. But still, California drivers got nothin’ on the Thais.

It wouldn’t be so bad if the speeds where constant and everybody drove in the same direction. Apparently there are no laws that encourage this. Our two lane freeway had sports cars and SUVs going 70 miles an hour in the right lane, while big trucks, scooters, and little Toyota pickups with 10-15 workers in the back, where doing 40 miles an hour in the left hand lane. And then there where the crazy drivers doing 80 plus miles an hour making the others look like ski gates in a downhill race.
The two lane freeway soon gave way to an even more exciting 3 lane (each way) highway that had cars merging and exiting from roadside stands, while about every 2 miles you could expect to see cars from the other side of the highway doing u-turns in front of you, or the cars in your lane slowing down to make a u-turn. Oh, and people drive the other way on the shoulder. If you miss a freeway exit, no problem, just back up until you get to it.

In America we have signs for deer crossings, elk crossings, etc. Keep in mind the damage they can inflict on your car. In Thailand they have signs for elephant crossings. You might as well run broadside into a cement truck. In Thailand the most common animal to cross a highway or freeway is by far the homo sapien. You’ll sometimes see a half dozen of them on a highway median attempting to cross three lanes doing 60 plus mph. Two to four of them will make a break for it while the others, either because they are slower or more cautious will remain behind. As you pass, you glance in the rearview mirror and find yourself half looking for carnage and half hoping they will make it.